By Seth Lukas Hynes
Every year has some film-related bad news and disappointments, but you might say that this year’s incidents were more provocative than most.
In March we had the slap heard across the world: Will Smith assaulted Chris Rock live on stage at the Oscars (and won Best Actor for King Richard a few minutes later). Rock cautiously discussed the slap in public, and Smith issued a slightly stiff apology over social media and received a ten-year ban from the Oscar Academy.
Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore star Ezra Miller has been indicted or accused of multiple felonies, including harassment, burglary, assault, running a compound full of drugs and guns, and an inappropriate, controlling relationship with a young Native American woman. Warner Bros is proceeding with the Flash movie (despite Miller as its problematic lead), and yet they cancelled the Batgirl movie, wasting $70 million in the process.
Don’t Worry Darling was fraught with behind-the-scenes drama: director Olivia Wilde and star Florence Pugh reportedly did not get along, Wilde may be lying about a major casting decision, and Harry Styles is rumoured to have spat on Chris Pine at a promotional event (this didn’t actually happen).
Morbius was universally panned as one of the worst superhero movies ever made, but memes from trolls and ironic fans (“It’s Morbin’ time”) somehow convinced Sony to rerelease Morbius in cinemas, where it bombed to nobody’s surprise but Sony’s.
The Netflix drama Blonde was widely condemned for its heavily-fictionalised and exploitative portrayal of Marilyn Monroe’s life. The Wonder and Men are both very good films with an inverse severe flaw: the former has a bad opening, the latter a bad ending.
On a sadder note, actor Kevin Conroy died of intestinal cancer on November 10. With his formidable gravitas and sensitivity, Conroy’s voice performances in Batman: The Animated Series and the Arkham video games are widely regarded as the definitive portrayal of Batman, and he is deeply missed.
Here are my picks for the top ten worst films of 2022.
10. The Wonder. A prime example of how one bad decision can crash an otherwise great film. The Wonder is tense, well-acted and beautifully shot, but a prologue explicitly describing The Wonder as a film instantly kills any engagement with the plot, as we are now acutely aware of its fakeness.
9. BigBug. A painful inclusion, as I love director Jean-Pierre Jeunet. BigBug is charming and vibrant, but it’s very sitcommy, far too long and a bit too silly for its own good.
8. Jurassic World: Dominion. Features some cool set-pieces and very impressive practical creature effects, but the characters are cardboard cut-outs, the pacing is disjointed, and the plot muddies its own lore and carries very little real tension.
7. Mother/Android. Features strong performances, sound design and suspense, but also generic designs for its robot antagonists, excessive exposition and yet flimsy worldbuilding.
6. Dual. Has some clever ideas and funny moments, but the overall film is punishingly flat and low-energy. In her double-role as Sara and her clone, Dual wastes Karen Gillan twice.
5. Morbius. A joyfully over-the-top performance from Matt Smith is the only source of life in a dry, meandering thriller with empty characters and incoherent action.
4. Moonfall. A work of disaster porn too hollow to amaze, the characters are bland or obnoxious (or both) and the plot barely makes any sense (and is full of tremendously bad science).
3. Loveland. A tedious sci-fi drama with glacial pacing, no chemistry between the leads, a criminal misuse of Hugo Weaving and an incredibly light, vague sense of conflict. The best part is the cyberpunk cityscape, which feels ripped wholesale from Blade Runner.
2. The Next 365 Days, and 1. 365 Days: This Day. It feels appropriate to discuss these films – sequels to the worst film of 2020 – together. Both are staggeringly vain, poorly-acted slogs in which almost nothing ever happens, choked with pop songs and devoid of passion despite the explicit sex scenes. They’re basically the same boring yet infuriating movie, and are together the worst movie of 2022.
Check back next week for my list of this year’s best films.
